Just Like His Eyes
by Snivilis
Summary: There are things we regret, and there are things others regret. Once in a while, there are things we are allowed to repend upon. PreDH


**Disclaimer:** Don't own.

**Author's notes:** This was done for a challenge. I have posted the challenge at the end of the fic so that you will not be spoiled. After you are done reading, you can read the challenge and decide if it was well answered. **WARNING:** light slash

**Look At Me**

**July 31, 2000**

It was a happy day for the wizards' world. The weather was perfect, the trees were green, and the most evil Dark Lord that wizard kind had known was dead. He wasn't dead like last time, of that they were mostly sure.

It was a sad day for the wizards' world. Many good people were dead. The savior of all wizard kind was dead and on this sad day was his funeral.

The ones closest to him knew that he would not have approved of the funeral he was receiving. It was open to the public, the Ministry had felt they should organize it to try and win some of the public back, and there were hundreds of people there. The people were separated in two groups. The first group were the people that knew him. There weren't many there since most of them were dead, just like him. The alive ones were surrounding his dead body, laid out in a pearl white coffin, and taking in the sleeping face, remembering. Several of the people there had noted that it was not only the same color but the same design as the one their friend's mentor had been laid in some time ago.

The second group was several meters back from the inner circle of people. They were 'the rest'. That was how Draco Malfoy thought of them. To him they were 'the rest'. The ones that had never shared more than two words with him. The ones that had never touched him. The ones that believed everything that was written down about him. The ones that did not have the memories of the broken down boy that went to fight a monster and came out as dead as the monster that broke him. They were the ones that did not know who Harry Potter really was. They were 'the rest'.

He had not been there long. It was about halfway through the ceremony when he had finally gotten over his fear of those around him and had stepped out from 'the rest', past the ministry provided aurors, and into the inner circle of people. It had taking him a lot to show up in front of everyone else, but he knew that no matter what they thought, he could not ignore the fact that the one being buried was the one he had shared many nights with. It was the one that he itched to touch at least once more, to see at least once more, to say goodbye to at least once more.

He had been there no more than a few seconds when a piercing shriek broke through the almost silent crowd and something slammed into him, bringing him to the ground. His instincts were the only thing saving him from slamming his head. It took him a moment to realize that the thing that had slammed into him was actually a person and on top of that it was a red headed, very enraged, person. Many things had changed during the war. He had learned that survival came first and questions later. With speed and pure physical force Draco got his legs under the raging person, who was apparently still a bit dazed from falling on top of him, and kicked straight and forward, sending her flying back. The moment the person was off of him, he was up, his wand was out, and he was in a dueling stance, ready to protect himself.

The person, as it turned out, was none other than one Genevra Weasely, who at that particular moment was in the arms of her brother Bill Weasely. Draco couldn't help frowning. He knew that the Weaselys didn't like him but after two years of working together in the war, he had thought that they would be at least civil to him. They never trusted him, he didn't lie to himself about that, and Harry and he had never dared tell them about their relationship knowing that it would most likely create a rift between Harry and his friends and that couldn't be allowed to happen in the middle of a war. However, they had never tried to attack him before and now that the war was over he had not expected them to turn on him so fast. 

He could see the Weasely girl struggling against her brother, trying to get to him, and he could hear her yelling something, but the rage in her voice and the struggling was making her words slur and not understandable. Slowly, Draco resumed a calm position and turned towards the body of his dead lover, his mind set on ignoring the fury directed towards him. He couldn't see his lover from where he was so he made a step forward to get closer. A step, however, was as far as he got before he was stopped by the rest of the people in the inner circle. Apparently, in his struggle with the redhead, they had formed a wall in front of Harry's coffin. Draco frowned yet again. He didn't need veritaserum to understand that he wasn't welcomed. However he also knew that he didn't need their welcome to see one last time his dead love.

"Get out of here!" Where the first understandable words uttered to him. They were also the first words that Draco had heard from Longbottom in two years. He had refused to speak around him since Draco changed sides. Two years, and the first words he had said to him were meant to make him leave without finishing what he had come for. Draco could feel rage building in his chest. It was slowly pushing towards his throat. 

"He told you to get out of here, Malfoy, are you deaf? You have no place here!" This time it was Ronald Weasely. Draco's rage doubled. They had no right to chase him away.

"Move it Malfoy, this is no place for traitors!" This time it was Bill Weasely. The rage in Draco's chest had finally moved in his throat and was now making him explode with all of the frustration and pain that he had felt since Harry's death.

"Traitor?...TRAITOR?...I WAS THERE, FIGHTING BESIDE HIM THE WHOLE TIME! WHERE WERE YOU? I SAW HIM GET HIT BY THE CRUCIATUS SEVEN TIMES! SEVEN! AFTER THAT IT WAS ONLY THE KILLING CURSE AND HE ALMOST GOT HIT FOUR TIMES! I DISTRACTED THE THREE DEATH EATERS THAT TRIED TO KILL HIM FROM THE BACK! WHERE WERE YOU?" Draco's voice had started giving out and he could feel his heart braking once more at the memory of the end. The rest of his speech was whispered and Draco could feel a tear slide down his face but he refused to move his eyes from Bill's for fear that he will break down before he can finish saying everything he wanted. 

"Where were you when he was on his knees in front of the Dark Lord, exhausted and apologizing to me that he didn't have the strength to finish it while blood, from the latest cruciatus, was seeping from his eyes? Where were YOU when the Dark Lord decided to finally finish it?" An image of an yew wand pointing towards the green eyes he loved so much flashed through his head and Draco fell to his knees, tears now freely flowing down his cheeks. He couldn't take to see the growing horror on Bill's face anymore and squeezed his eyes closed once more seeing his Harry at his final moments. With his voice full with the pain he felt, he finished. "I WAS PINNED DOWN BY THREE DEATH EATERS, WATCHING THE LOVE OF MY LIFE BLEED FROM HIS EYES WHILE A MONSTER CAST A KILLING CURSE AND ALL MY HARRY COULD SAY WAS SORRY! WHERE WERE YOU?"

Once he had finished, Draco stood still on his knees in front of a crowd of people, his tears falling shamelessly on the grass under him. It didn't take but a moment for murmurs to start going through the crowd. No one had known how exactly the Dark Lord was defeated or how their savior had died. The now unconstrained Weasely girl had started screaming and crying and the murmurs, which by know were full out talk, quieted down, the crowd listening to the redhead and trying to understand her words from the crying in her voice.

"YOU LIER! YOU BASTARD! YOU MONSTER! YOU KILLED HIM! I WAS THERE, I SAW YOU, YOU KILLED HIM AFTER THE KILLING CURSE BOUNCED BACK TO VOLDEMORT." The scream had made the crowd start talking once again. While the name of the Dark Lord had made all of them either shiver or gasp. The Weasely girl was once again restrained in her brother's arms and Draco had opened his eyes to look at her, tears never stopping. At first he did not answer but just stared, his eyes pained. The red head had apparently taken that as a denial because she started screaming once more.

"DON'T LIE! I SAW YOU! YOU WERE IN FRONT OF HIM WHILE HE WAS ON HIS KNEES AND YOU CAST THE KILLING CURSE, YOU KILLED HIM!" After the second scream was over, the corner of Draco's mouth twitched and he smiled sadly. The crowd was once again quiet. It was a silence of anticipation and unease. Aurors were trying their best to keep the mob from getting closer to the people in the middle. They however weren't paying much attention since they were also trying to find out the response to Genevra Weasely's accusation.

Draco did not yell back. He did not move. Just kept on his sad smile and whispered "You're right. I killed him. Just as he would have wished." At his words, there were gasps from everywhere and the Weasely girl broke from her restrain and pointed her wand at him, casting the killing curse.

Draco knew what was coming and he was fine with it. He could see her lips moving in the words that would take his life away and an even stronger pain shot through his heart as the memory of Harry's death hit him once more.

Draco could see his lover on his knees in front of the Dark Lord. His eyes were sad and the blood seeping from them was making them more green than before. He could feel the two Death Eaters holding his shoulders, the pain from his broken right arm shooting to the shoulder that was wrenched back, and blood seeping from the cuts on his body made by the many curses he had fallen a victim to. The third one was to the side, pointing a wand to his head and making him watch towards his lover, even thought he didn't exactly need the initiative. A movement in the corner of his eye made him turn his eyes towards the monster that had his Harry at his knees.

Just as he was breathing in, Draco could feel his body freeze and a gasp escaped his lips. The Dark Lord was about to cast the killing curse and Draco knew that this was the end. It was the end of all the beauty that he had found in the past two years in a boy whose eyes could make him beg for anything in the world, if they would just look at him once more. It was the end of a world in which he might have had a chance at being happy. It was the end to Harry Potter, the one he gave up everything for.

His eyes switching back to his lovers', Draco could see him mouth the word 'sorry' and then his body spasmed, surrounded by green light. Draco was sure that it didn't last longer than a few moments but to him it felt like forever, watching his lover die. The green light, however, pulled away and headed straight for the monster that had made it. It hit him and the Dark Lord's body convulsed, finally falling unmoving on the ground. The Death Eaters around him convulsed and crushed his shoulders, his broken arm exploding in pain and making him loose consciousness for a few moments.

Once he was back to himself, Draco crawled out of the now dead bodies of Death Eaters around him and headed towards Harry, praying to whatever gods existed that his lover was alive. Once a few steps away, Draco noticed that Harry hadn't moved at all from the position, on his knees, that he had been in when the curse hit him. His eyes were closed, there was a tiny smile on his lips, and Draco noticed with great relief that he was still breathing. He couldn't help but laugh out of joy.

"You did it Harry! You killed him! It's over!" His joy, however did not distract him from the curl of Harry's lips into a cruel smile. Draco felt his heart skip a beat. "Harry?" The name was only whispered as if he was afraid that he might be wrong. Slowly, Harry's eyes opened and Draco felt his heart die. The eyes looking at him were no longer the green he loved. They were red and Draco knew in that moment that it truly was over.

With a sad smile, Draco cast the killing curse towards the body that he had made love to countless times.

"AVADA KEDAVRA"

"He was already dead..."came Draco's last whisper before the green light touched him. 'Just like his eyes' were his last thoughts.

Author's note: I think I should mention this at the end of the fic, that the challenge was: At Harry's funeral...Draco shows up, but no one knew of his and Harry's relationship. Everyone makes it clear Draco's not wanted, but he persists and gets into a fight with Ginny, who saw him kill Harry after Voldie was destroyed. I want a lot of yelling, crying, and a big confession from Draco. -thindiell


End file.
